COVID days and dark nights

Jan 22-23 : Weekend spent at chitta's house.

Jan 23 : Chitta and uncle test COVID postive, ammuma negative

Jan 24 : We are kept out of the family boating trip arranged from Poothotta. agrahavum nirbandhavum enteyayirunnu but othathu bakki ellarkum. Full day boating , lunch , resort chuttal and then high tea.

Jan 25-30 : chuma, neerveezhcha starts for amma. kanji rasam in the house. njanum Hariyum valya asukhangalillathe kazhinju pokunnu. Everday i cried, virtual orphan feeling.

Jan 30 : went to DDC COVID collection lab for RT-PCR test. I cried a lot today also. From Day1 of marriage, I have only thought about husband and later about kids but i am virtually no one for them other than a meal provider or cleaner. Everyone has becomes independent except me.

Jan 31 : akshamarayi resultinu kathirikkunnu. Labilekku pala thavana vilichenkilum result vannittilla enna utharam. I even packed my bag to go to Poothotta thinking it will just be flu and test will come negative. samayam uchakku oru 12:30 ayappol aa call vannu - all 3 of us POSITIVE.

Feb 1 : No query from health workers. Other than that both landphone and mobiles were continously ringing. For patients, this i the most irritating thing ever. You cannot even lie down though sick. And to everyone you have to explain top to bottom , which is not only useless but just adds to your sickness and frustration. I started checking the insurance related emails from Infosys and tries to setup an online doctor consultation. Called up Amrita Institute and they redirected me to several numbers. After 2-3 hours of wasting my time, looked like they didnt have one for COVID patients. The only silver lining to this cloud was I the entitlement to 21 days of leave which means some salary for Feb !

Next i tried Aster. Dr Ashok Komaranchath turned very helpful. I posted a query in the watsapp group nd he replied with the doc who does the consultation. I went online and booked the appointment for 3:40pm. From 3:40, we waited and after 1.5 hours doc turns up. Docs are super busy ! It was just a10 mnt affair and he said looks like mild COVID for us. Next i started checking how to get the medicines delivered at home and finally figured that also. A million thanks to gpay for contactless payment. Be it provision ,fish, chicken or medicine, everything is at doorstep because of you during quarantine.

Ammuma tests positive but asymptomatic. Chitta has very bad cough and docs are suspecting a secondary infection. Both are moved to Lakshmi Hospital for X Ray, scan and further treatment.

Feb 2 : Hari has fever , eats , takes medicine and sleeps. I insisted he takes a quick body bath and dress change everyday. I also realized that no one other than me are interested in eating anything healthy. Bread a nd biscuits were supposedly what the mother and son loved. Suddenly , amma feels like having fish and places the phone order. Fish arrives and she prepares the curry. I made vegetable thoran. There were lot of veggies in the fridge and i was eating my lunch - platter of curry and thoran with spoonful of rice. After yoga, bath ,breakfast and a bit of newspaper, there is literally nothing to do. Boring days ever ! Binge watching "Little Things" on Netflix...its about a young couple in a Live In relationship. How they find time for little things is amazing and that is what i think i miss the most.

Feb 3 : I come to realise that i am falling into depression and want to move away from everyone. People who i thought are my own re actually not. They are individuals and for them i am probably just a cook or a maid at service. This thought has started eating me (another blog post) and i cried a lot today also. Thanks to the situation, everyone around thinks i have a cold. To get the .Today i had a fall too while washing my legs at the washing stone outside. I thought i lost balance and hit the tank ,falling into the drain beside. There was nothing to hold on to and it all happened in a minute. Thankfully, head didn't hit !

I am 39 and from yesterday i have a feeling i might die due to COVID too. If all 3 of us die, nothing like it. There would be no mourning and no concerns.

Today is another boring day. Started reading the book on Malala but very boring and stopped after the first 10-12 pages. Watched a movie "The Last Colour" on Amazon.

Feb 4 : Continue the morning yoga practise ,now that i cant even think of doing Bollywood fitness without wearing shoes. Husband had come by and shared few of my home clothes. Another boring day watcing "little things" and trying not to fall asleep in the afternoon.

Feb 5 :  This was the revised date decided for our return trip to Blr. Now that i have COVID, it is not happening. Cheeku will start her annual exams on Feb 11 and we might return only by month end. The chances of going via Valparai is now bleak. Captured my selfies for all 5 days, made collage and sent to the husband.

Feb 6 : Started the day as usual with yoga and did 15 rounds of Surya Namaskar . I think we all have recovered well without complications from COVID, touch wood. After drinking all that Hibiscus juice, i really wanted to check my HB and then came this COVID storm and washed it away :( 

We were all craving badly for sweets, so ordered milma peda along with the grocery. I hate the concept now where each 5 rs peda is wrapped in plastic. Why the hell are they doing this !! 

Feb 7:  Started the day with yoga. I am feeling better ,so completed all 21 rounds of surya namaskar. Today Sreettan also started yoga, i dont know after how long. Cheeku has been exercising regularly too in the evenings around 5pm and i am very proud of that. Just that there is not enough time for her hair to dry post bath before going to bed ! Jaya did a video call and chatted for a long time. My main hobby is looking at all pics, thanks to google !

Amma wanted to eat payasam and i made "Veena chechi's' yummy palpayasam. We also got some parcels from neighbor for their son's birthday celebrations. Sugar loaded Sunday. Just finished video call with kids. Positive vibes today.

Feb 8 : Another boring day. Tension too ! As per Taluk Hospital doc, we must go for Antigen test on Feb 9. What if the antigen test turns out positive ? is there a Reverse Quarantine needed before coming into contact with others ? It was almost 18 days and i couldn't wait any longer to meet Sreettan and kids. Bought chicken and made curry. That was the day's highlight. Amma doesn't feel like eating rice but me and Hari are fine. Nalla vishapundu and taste too.

Feb 9 : Test Day - Found a cab which carries COVID positive patients and arranged the same . oh my god ! more than the disease itself, these kind of things were the actual killers. There were no health workers or ward members to help the family, only numerous phone calls to get the number of affected people, age etc for producing statistics. Amma wanted Sreettan to take us to DDC for the test but i discouraged (He didnt offer either). We went and gave the Antigen test and came home in the same taxi. Test result was Negative for 3 of us. Lucky to have survived Corona attack without any complications. Amma and Hari wouldn't have handled this so well if I wasn't with them , be it booking cabs or getting medicine and grocery home delivered. Another 2 more days before going to Poothotta so that it will be full 21 days from first contact with chitta. I made collage with all 10 day's selfies - something to remember :) Ammuma and chitta still in hospital. Chitta has antibiotic injections for possible secondary infection and might get re-tested tomorrow before discharge.